No relationship is ever perfect, but that doesn’t mean it shouldn’t be unequivocally healthy. Couples therapy is one excellent way to address potential issues in your relationship before they develop into full-blown problems, creating a rift between yourself and your partner. At MLS Mindful Therapy, we believe in empowering both halves of a relationship to resolve their differences and grow closer together.
Psychologist and relationship expert John M. Gottman writes, “Like the Second Law of Thermodynamics, which says that in closed energy systems things tend to run down and get less orderly, the same seems to be true of closed relationships like marriages. My guess is that if you do nothing to make things get better in your marriage but do not do anything wrong, the marriage will still tend to get worse over time. To maintain a balanced emotional ecology you need to make an effort.”
Every relationship struggles sometimes—that just means it’s time to take steps towards repairing it.
Consider these 3 common relationship problems and how couples therapy can help.
Unmet Emotional Needs
Everyone has emotional needs, but everyone’s emotional needs are different. If one partner is fairly self-confident in their decision-making, for instance, then they might not realize that their spouse requires frequent reassurance that their choices are valid and supported.
Gottman writes, “Successful long-term relationships are created through small words, small gestures, and small acts.” Understanding your partner’s emotional needs is critical when seeking to meet them.
Disconnects like this are extremely common. Couples therapy can help repair the broken line of communication.
Money
According to a survey by the Cashlorette of over 1,000 people, “Nearly half of Americans (48%) who are married or living with a partner say they argue with the person over money… Most of those fights are about spending habits, with 60% saying that one person spends too much or the other is too cheap. The remaining fights are pretty evenly split between someone being dishonest about money, how to divide the bills and other types of money fights, which could be anything from disagreements over forgetting to pay a bill to a couple’s financial priorities in life.”
Clearly, money is a common stumbling block in even the most committed relationships. Couples therapy can identify both partners’ fundamental beliefs about money in order to help them reach mutually acceptable agreements on spending, saving, and more.
Sexual Incompatibility
Gottman writes, “When we fall in love we are often on our very best behavior. We lead with the healthiest side of ourselves. But as relationships progress, each person gets more real, more transparent, and therefore more vulnerable.” This includes the bedroom, as well.
In the early stages of a relationship, many people feel constantly attracted to their partner and eager to be intimate. After marriage, however, daily life can begin setting in and revealing potentially mismatched desires.
Maybe one partner has much higher libido than the other. Maybe they find it difficult to communicate their likes and dislikes in the bedroom. These kinds of differences can result in sexless marriages, one partner feeling pressured by the other, or even one or both partners seeking affairs outside the relationship.
Couples therapy can help make these difficult discussions more comfortable and straightforward, improving communication and improving the marriage’s sexual dimension as a result.
Contact MLS Mindful Therapy Today
MLS Mindful Therapy is proud to serve clients in the states of both Pennsylvania and Florida via virtual telehealth counseling. To learn more about how we can help your relationship address any present problems, feel free to contact us with your questions today.
